Team Talk Fantasy Football Gameweek 34

Team Talk Fantasy Football Gameweek 34

Welcome to the funhouse,
That is Gameweek 34.
Where everyone is hoping,
For a giant total score.

Of course it may not happen,
And there may be quite a lull.
If Chelsea underperform
And the Scousers don’t beat Hull.

Our gameweek starts at lunchtime
On Saturday down by the sea.
As the Saints try to recover
Versus HurriKane and Chadli.

And then for the 3 o’clockers
And this week we have six.
As our points start to roll in
To satisfy our fix.

A massive relegation six-pointer,
As Leicester visit Burnley.
Three points would be massive for either,
To escape the bottom three.

Now Hull are in deep trouble,
Which feels very déjà vu.
And this week a trip to Palace,
To face the might of Lord Pardew.

The Lord is indeed a master
A must for top boss this year
He not only saved Palace
But made sure Toon were almost clear.

But since he left, the Magpies
Have missed his manager skills.
It’s the Swansea this week for the Toon
They’ll likely be no thrills.

QPR host the Hammers,
For a good ol’ London scrap.
Rangers fighting, battling,
And West Ham just being crap.

There’s always a match or two.
Which is a bore or just a joke.
And this week we have Dick’s Black Cats
Taking on the slightly less dull Stoke.

The Scousers are heartbroken,
For Gerrard no Wembley swansong.
Just six Premier League matches remain for him,
Starting with West Brom.

The evening sees City host Villa
And the gilet wearing one.
Let’s hope the smug grin gets wiped off his face,
By the hat-trick scoring Kun.

Sunday takes us to Liverpool,
But it’s ok as it’s the Blue half.
Another away day for United,
Where Rooney could have the last laugh.

Chelsea welcome the Goonies,
With the Blues ten points clear.
Anything less than an Arsenal win,
Means it’s over for another year.

And so onto the doubles.
To Hull on a Tuesday night,
Is not what Mario signed up for,
But the ending is in sight.

Our week finishes with Leicester playing Chelsea,
A game full of spice and intrigue.
Another win for the battling Foxes,
Or Jose celebrating the league?

Still awake? Cool, step on it then as we need to go Around the Grounds for the all important team news.

Southampton vs Spurs (Sat 25 Apr 12.45)
So we kick off our 5-day gameweek with a Saturday lunchtime trip down to the south coast for Southampton vs Spurs – or as I’d rather call it, the battle for sixth. Both teams have had a small wobble of late, although Spurs did get back to winning ways last week at Newcastle and Southampton have won both of their last two games at home. So there is unlikely to be much between the two, as their league positions and points tally’s would indicate. Mauricio Pochettino returns to his former haunt and would like nothing better than to finish above the Saints to justify his moving to Spurs, while of course the Saints would love to get one over their old manager – something they were unable to do earlier in the season when a Christian Eriksen goal was enough to give Spurs a narrow victory at the Lane. In fact, Spurs have won their last five matches against Southampton and with Harry Kane finding his scoring boots again, one imagines they may just need to keep a clean sheet and let the HurriKane do the rest. However, keeping a clean sheet may been an issue, even vs Graziano Pelle and friends, for the Spurs have only kept one in their last ten matches. Then again, this is Southampton, who have only scored eight goals in their last eleven. Conclusion….don’t wait in and watch the game – there’s plenty left to come this gameweek!

Saints defender Toby Alderweireld has recovered from the shoulder injury he sustained at Stoke – Toby trained on Thursday and if there is no reaction, he’ll be fit to face Spurs. Midfielder Filip Djuricic remains out with an ankle injury as of course does keeper Fraser Forster, while Victor Wanyama misses out through suspension.

Keeper Hugo Lloris faces a fight to be fit for the trip to Southampton – the Frenchman has missed the best part of the last four matches with a knee injury and manager Mauricio Pochettino said that Lloris “is close – we need to assess him after training on Friday, but he has a chance.” Jan Vertonghen has recovered from illness, leaving just Kyle Walker as the only definite absentee – the defender is likely to be out for a further four weeks with his foot injury.

[divider_1px]

Burnley vs Leicester (Sat 25 Apr 15.00)
Wow. Fair play to the Foxes, I’d certainly written them off a number of weeks ago – and I’m sure you had too. But three wins out of three has seen them not only climb off the butt of the league, but also go level with 17th placed Hull. Burnley have taken Leicester’s place at the bottom, meaning this game is huge – and pretty much a must-win for Sean Dyche’s men. The problem with Burnley is they have forgotten to score so badly that we suspect they have already replaced Liverpool target Danny Ings and replaced him with a disguised Graziano Pelle – or an even better disguised Mario Balotelli. Oh go on then, I’ll chuck Liverpool target Radamel Falcao in there, just to avoid being called biased! Back to Burnley and they have scored one goal in seven matches, yep you read that correctly. One goal in their last seven matches. Now, you can get a result with a bad defence if you can just outscore the oppo – but a failure to find the back of the net only brings one outcome. I feel a sudden urge to buy Kasper Schmeichel and Jeffrey Schlupp! Schlupp actually scored vs Burnley earlier in the season when the teams played out a 2-2 draw – can he do it again? Do you believe in fate? Tempted for the DGW…he who dares and all that!

Back in October Burnley ended a 565-minute club record goal drought in the draw with Leicester. This time its only been 389 minutes, but again it’s the Foxes as the oppo. They’ll have to do without the suspended Ashley Barnes, who was sent off in the defeat at Everton last week, while Dean Marney and Kevin Long continue to miss out.

Faced with the prospect of three games in seven days, Foxes manager admits some of his squad have a few bumps and bruises, while he describes striker David Nugent as only touch and go. Defender Marcin Wasilewski is one of those believed to be doubtful with a thigh injury.

[divider_1px]

Crystal Palace vs Hull (Sat 25 Apr 15.00)
The forgotten team of DGW34, Hull travel to Palace with their own crumb of comfort being that the Eagles went down last week to the Baggies, who themsleves had conceded ten goals in the previous three, but managed to contain the likes of Yannick Bolasie (hands up if you got puffed in) and Glenn Murray (yeah, got puffed in myself on that one). Funny old game. Hull had last week off due to Liverpool losing in the Cup semi final (more of that later) so Steve Bruce has had time to gather his troops, work on their tactics and carry on a run of horrendous results. Three losses in a row and just one win in seven sees the Tigers on the brink of falling into the drop zone at just the wrong time, hence the lack of interest for many in their DGW. Palace had of course been on a great run before Pulis returned to slay the Pardew dragon – nice one Tony. Hull beat the Eagles 2-0 earlier in the season, but that was pre-Pardew and now the Lord is at the helm we would expect Palace to return to winning ways and return that annoying, patronising, smug grin back onto the Lord’s face.

Palace strikers Fraizer Campbell and Marouane Chamakh have returned to training but won’t be considered for Saturday. However, there is better news in midfield as Jordon Mutch and Lee Chung-yong have both returned to training and could make the bench.

Influential Hull midfielder Mo Diame broke down in training this week and is extremely doubtful and certainly not 100%. Manager Steve Bruce would dearly love him available but admits it would be a huge risk to play him at Palace – he’ll travel with the squad and a late decision will be made. Defenders Andrew Robertson and Curtis Davies have been ruled out, while David Meyler is suspended. Robert Snodgrass and Nikica Jelavic remain long term absentees, but Gaston Ramirez is fit to return.

[divider_1px]

Newcastle vs Swansea (Sat 25 Apr 15.00)
Six successive defeats has left Toon caretaker manager John Carver to admit his team are in a relegation battle. Well, they’re on 35pts so maybe not quite and one imagines that a single win in any of their remaining five matches will probably be enough. Bear in mind they entertain Swansea this week and also West Brom and West Ham to come, they should be ok – which is a bit of a shame and I don’t know anyone who wouldn’t like Toon owner and destroyer Mike Ashley to suffer further. So it’s the Swans this week, who after last weekend’s defeat at Leicester are still a point short of a club record total in the Premier League – something that manager Garry Monk would like to notch as soon as possible. Surprisingly, the Toon have never beaten Swansea at home in the Premier League, losing twice and drawing the other – another defeat here will leave Carver and his boys looking very nervously over their shoulders, especially with the likes of Hull and Leicester playing twice.

Carver says he has come up with a formula to get three points vs Swansea. Resign? Elope with Gabriel Obertan? Food poison the Swans pre-match meal? Get Lord Pardew back? Finally some positive news for the Toon as Siem de Jong and Jonas Gutierrez return to the squad. Gutierrez has had clear the air talks with Carver, while de Jong impressed while playing for the U21s in the week and may feature for the first time since GW3. Massadio Haidara, Steven Taylor, Rolando Aarons and Cheick Tiote remain out while Papiss Cisse and Moussa Sissoko are suspended. It is thought that defender Paul Dummett is close to a return. Back up keeper Rob Elliot has been ruled out for the rest of the season after suffering a thigh strain in training. With the other back up, Jak Alnwick also ruled out, England U19 keeper Freddie Woodman will be on the bench.

Swansea have no fresh injuries for the weekend but will be without Neil Taylor who is suspended. Bafetimbi Gomis and Kyle Naughton continue to be sidelined – Monk is hopeful that Gomis may return in a fortnight.

[divider_1px]

QPR vs West Ham (Sat 25 Apr 15.00)
A good old London derby as west meets east – one team fighting desperately for Premier League survival and the other desperately waiting for the end of the season so they can jet off and enjoy themselves for a few weeks. Rangers of course had a decent DGW31, beating West Brom and a high scoring draw at Villa, but don’t forget they had lost the five before that and lost in GW32 to Chelsea. With Leicester showing form and trips to Liverpool and City to come this has the feel of a must win for the Hoops. Therefore who better to play than the Hammers who have nothing to play for, don’t really like their manager, have a few injuries and have won just one of their last eleven matches. Sadly for Rangers they have lost three and drawn one of their last four meetings with the Hammers, but the chances are they’ll have a proper go at the Hammers and with an optimistic crowd roaring them on, their will to win may just be enough to get the three points and make the relegation fight even more competitive.

Rangers boss Chris Ramsey says he may be “tempted to take a chance on him for Saturday”, even though the midfielder is not quite 100% – it shows how important Fer is to the Hoops. If he doesn’t start, Fer is likely to at least be on the bench. Ramsey is pleased to reveal that some of his players who were suffering with knocks have recovered and may be available. Take that to read the likes of Adel Taarabt and Darnell Furlong, who both turned out for the U21s in the week. Alejandro Faurlin also featured in that match but is unlikely to play vs the Hammers as he has been out for much longer and will need more time. Defender Suk-Young Yun has recovered from a head injury, but Rio Ferdinand is out.

The Hammers continue to be without James Tomkins, Diafra Sakho and Andy Carroll with Big Sam admitting all three may not feature again this season. Guy Demel has joined the injury list with a calf injury, but aside from him the squad will likely be the same as last week.

[divider_1px]

Stoke vs Sunderland (Sat 25 Apr 15.00)
Fair play to the Premier League for arranging this game amongst eleven other this week, so that it is easily ignored and we can all move on swiftly! Stoke, like West Ham above, have nothing to play for, but did pull a win over Southampton out of their hats last weekend. Sunderland though have plenty to play for, primarily their survival. Their derby win was meant to push them on, but the subsequent thrashing at home by Palace just emphasised to new manager Dick Advocaat that his job is going to be slightly tougher than he first imagined. Somewhow, Sunderland won the reverse fixture 3-1 in October, thrilling eh? That’s about as interesting as it gets. Enjoy!

Stoke welcome back Peter Odemwingie into the matchday squad – the winger hasn’t appeared since getting injured in the win at City in GW3, but has been working hard on his rehabilitation and fitness and is now ready to return. Peter Crouch and Stephen Ireland have recovered from knocks and will also be involved, but Victor Moses, Marc Muniesa and Bojan Krkic remain sidelined.

Sunderland confirm that Adam Johnson will still be considered for selection, despite the midfielder being charged by the police this week. Manager Dick Advocat says he will be in the squad if he feels up to it. Steven Fletcher has picked up an ankle injury and has been ruled out, while the Black Cats will also continue to be without Wes Brown, Ricky Alavarez and Emanuele Giaccherini while Seb Larsson misses the trip due to suspension.

[divider_1px]

West Brom vs Liverpool (Sat 25 Apr 15.00)
The first game for Liverpool in their DGW sees a trip to the Baggies, who will be buoyed after their win at Palace last weekend, especially as they seemed to be losing their way after successive defeats to City, QPR and Leicester. Liverpool of course will need to pick themsleves up after losing their FA Cup semi final to goals from Liverpool target Christian Benteke and Liverpool target Fabian Delph – all that remains for them now is the league and the possibility of a top 4 spot – it’s likely they’ll need to win five of their last six matches to give them any chance – bearing in mind one of those matches is at Chelsea, there is little room for any slip ups. Liverpool have a mixed record at the Hawthorns, winning just two of the last five there and will need to be wary of Liverpool target Saido Berahino. But this season Brendan Rodgers’ men have been consistent versus the teams below them in the league, only losing to United twice and Arsenal since they went down at Palace in November. This week will prove a big test for Rodgers’ man management skills, which have been criticised of late – a return to winning ways could see them yet compete with their Manchester rivals for a Champions League place. Rodgers says he is the ideal man to be leading Liverpool – I quite agree Brendan, I quite agree.

The Baggies have no new injuries for the weekend, with Craig Dawson recovering from the knee injury he sustained in the win at Palace. On loan defender Andre Wisdom is ineligible to play vs Liverpool, his parent club. Midfielder Youssuf Mulumbu is suspended, while Ben Foster has of course been ruled out for the long term.

Liverpool go into game one of their DGW without Daniel Sturridge, Lucas Leiva and Mamadou Sakho. The manager says he is unsure when Sturridge will be back. Adam Lallana has rejoined the squad and Rodgers says, “we will see how he is” – Lallana tweeted that he was 100% fit and available. Defender Jon Flanagan has also returned to full first team training and will be monitored. He hasn’t tweeted.

[divider_1px]

Man City vs Aston Villa (Sat 25 Apr 17.30)
City welcome the Cup finalists to the Etihad for a game that a few weeks ago would of been a nailed-on home victory. However, Tim Sherwood has transferred his own self-confidence onto that of the players, which was self evident not only in last week’s Wembley win over Liverpool, but also the league win at Spurs in GW32. The main beneficiary of this is Liverpool target Christian Benteke who has scored nine goals in his last seven matches! City have had a tough time since the turn of the year, slipping to fourth place and looking a shade of the side that won the league last season. Having lost consecutive matches they returned to winning ways vs West Ham last weekend without slipping out of 2nd gear and this weekend will surely pose a bigger test with Villa not close to safety yet. City have won the last seven league meetings between the two at the Etihad and while they will undoubtedly start this one as the favourite they will need to step up both their performance and their motivation if they are to stop Villa from causing another upset.

David Silva has recovered from his knock out blow vs West Ham and will be ok to face Villa on Sunday. There is other good news for City as Wilfried Bony and ex-Villain James Milner have also recovered in time. However, captain Vincent Kompany, Gael Clichy, Stevan Jovetic and Samir Nasri are all ruled out.

Sherwood is optimistic that striker Gabby Agbonlahor will recover from a knock to take his place in the team. In defence there is mixed news – Philippe Senderos and Aly Cissokho return to the squad, but there is not so good news of Nathan Baker and Ciaran Clark who are both sidelined with knee injuries – Clark has been ruled out for the season. Alan Hutton will also miss out, while Scott Sinclair is ineligible to play vs his parent club.

[divider_1px]

Everton vs Man Utd (Sun 26 Apr 13.30)
United aim to bounce back to winning ways, increase the pressure on Arsenal above them and stave off the challenge of City and Liverpool below them in an effort to give LVG the Champions League spot he was brought in to deliver in his first season. They won’t have it easy though as the Toffees have shown a return to form since exiting the Europa League and have won four and drawn the other of their past five matches, conceding just two goals in the process. The Europa League really is a poisoned chalice eh?! Before the loss at Chelsea, United had been on a great run also, winning six in a row, including victories over their nearest and dearest, Liverpool and City – but just as importantly they gave the impression that they had finally clicked into the LVG philosophy. United have struggled at Goodison of late, losing their last two there so it should be a close game, tough to call, though one suspects if United can get a couple of their vital injured players back then they may just have enough.

Roberto Martinez has declared Romelu Lukaku 100% fit, while midfielder Leon Osman has progressed well and will be assessed in training. James Mccarthy only returned to training on Friday so is a doubt for the game, while Steven Pienaar, Darron Gibson, Bryan Oviedo and Tony Hibbert remain out.

United will again be without midfield cog Michael Carrick as well as defenders Marcos Rojo and Phil Jones. Jonny Evans is available again from suspension and is likely to partner Chris Smalling at the back. Daley Blind has returned to training but is a doubt for Sunday, while fellow Dutchman RVP is available again. Rafael has been ruled out for the season with a rib injury. Ex-Toffees Marouane Fellaini and Wayne Rooney look forward to a return to their adoring fans.

[divider_1px]

Arsenal vs Chelsea (Sun 26 Apr 16.00)
The big match of the weekend sees Chelsea take the short trip to the Emirates to take on second placed Arsenal. If those Loony Gonnies still think they can catch Chelsea then they must win this one to close the gap to 7pts – of course, what those fans haven’t realised is that if City beat Villa and United win at Everton then a loss for Arsenal would see them back down to their familiar home of 4th place, albeit with a game in hand. Home is where the heart is eh? Whether Arsene Wenger has enough in his locker to suppress the Mourinho threat remains in doubt – le Professeur has not beaten the Special One in thirteen attempts yet and one look at how Chelsea made sure of the three points without being anywhere near their best last week vs United tells you everything you need to know about Jose’s desire to do what is necessary to win the match, rather than excite the plaudits and pundits. After all, in years to come the history book will say “Chelsea 2014/15 Champions” – it won’t say or care, for that matter, how they got over the line. Like or hate him, I can think of a few leading clubs who would have benefited from his will, desire and know-how to win come April and May. Eh, Brendan?

The biggest concern for Arsenal is defender Per Mertesacker, who Wenger describes as 50/50 to play – even that seems optimistic after the boss says Mert has spent all week in the treatment room and hasn’t trained. If he doesn’t play, Gabriel will slot in alongside Laurent Koscielny. Mikel Arteta and Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain both remain out.

Avoid Chelsea strikers is the message as Jose says Didier Drogba is fine for the weekend, he is “not sure” on whether Loic Remy will be available and he’ll take a late decision on Diego Costa. Mourinho did add that young striker Dominic Solanke was pulled out of an U21s match on Thursday in case he was needed at the Emirates, which suggests that Remy and Costa may not quite make it. Possibly. Costa will be available for Wednesday’s match at Leicester if he doesn’t play at Arsenal. There are no other injuries for the Blues.

[divider_1px]

Hull vs Liverpool (Tues 28 Apr 17.45)
A Tuesday night in Hull may not seem that attractive, but in all seriousness it shouldn’t hold too many problems for Liverpool. Hull have only ever beaten Liverpool once. Ever. Though that was last season. However this should prove the easier of the matches in Liverpool’s double gameweek. Clearly team news will be determind by the events of the matches on Saturday, though beware of Raheem’s tiredness, Sturridge’s injuries and Hull’s general uselessness.

[divider_1px]

Leicester vs Chelsea (Wed 29 Apr 17.45)
Our double gameweek ends as Chelsea go to Leicester and it could be a crucial night for both. If Chelsea beat Arsenal on Sunday then they will wrap up the league with a victory vs Leicester. The Foxes of course are in a fierce relegation battle and have gone all kamikaze on us – this one won’t be 0-0, rest assured of that. Unsurprisingly, Chelsea have a fairly good record vs Leicester, winning their last seven, scoring 21 goals in the process. Let’s hope for the Foxes sake, that they win at Burnley on Saturday!

[divider_1px]

Suspension Report DGW34

Ashley Barnes (Burnley)
David Meyler (Hull)
Papiss Cisse (Newcastle)
Moussa Sissoko (Newcastle)
Victor Wanyama (Southampton)
Seb Larsson (Sunderland)
Neil Taylor (Swansea)
Youssuf Mulumbu (West Brom)

Thanks for reading Team Talk Fantasy Football Gameweek 34. This article was written by Cookie

Follow @SteveCook9

[divider_1px]

Please remember to vote in this week’s Captain Poll

[polldaddy poll=8519167]