Socks, Sandals and Soccer: MLS Game Week 3 – Dallas Style

Socks, Sandals and Soccer: MLS Game Week 3 – Dallas Style

Have they let us come back and write another version of our FC Dallas “Fantasy MLS” blog? Yes, it certainly looks like it. Will anyone read it? Probably not.

Have I lived in the USA long enough to think that it is socially acceptable to ask, and answer, my own questions?

Why, yes. Yes, I believe I have.

So wassup people? All well I hope. Not too down in the dumps about last week’s 5-0 beating at Houston? You what? You didn’t even know they played?! Shocking. Well, as the season rumbles on, and as your FPL season comes to an end, our plan is to lure you into the Fantasy MLS game, to fill that off-season void. And as a secondary goal, we hope this venture will help our very own FC Dallas to find a special place in your soccer loving hearts.
For those that missed episode one, after each FCD home match Lawdogg and Chins will bring you a scouting report featuring those FCD players you need, and those you do not, based on our observations. TV only shows you the action on the ball; we are here to fill you in on what you do not see on TV. We will even also throw in some Intel on the opposing team. For each side you will get our three stars and goat for each team and, of course, there will be the unavoidable waffle.

So buckle up y’all. Here we go…

FC Dallas
3rd Star: Walker Zimmerman ($6.1)
After last week’s 5-0 hammering at the hands of our Texas rivals, we were expecting changes in the Dallas back line. Unfortunately for cult hero Atiba Harris, it was he that made way for the always impeccably presented Ryan Hollingshead (See Note 1). Zimmerman, however looks to have picked up where he left off last season. Not blessed with great pace, as you’d expect from someone with not one, but two devices for the mobility impaired in their name, but… his positional awareness more than makes up for it. Time and time again, he was in the right place at the right time to intercept or block a Montreal attack. With Loyd seemingly on the naughty step, Zimmer looks to be a lock in for the centre back spot alongside captain Hedges, and at $6.1m, a great addition to your team with the DGW coming up.

2nd Star: Mauro Diaz ($10.4m)
The little fella was at it again on Saturday. He notched (I love that word. Notched. Say it with me. Notched. Fantastic.)… He notched his first goal of the season, to go with his two assists from GWK1, and scored well in every bonus point category. Attacking bonus points? Yep. Defending bonus points? Yep. Recoveries? Surely not. Yep, 11 of the bad boys. This guy simply HAS to be in your team. Involved with absolutely everything good that Dallas did. Has a great eye for a pass, links up well with each of the other forward players, oh, and his free kicks aren’t bad either. He’s averaging 10 points per game over the first 3 game weeks, (including the 5-0 reverse to Houston!) and is showing no signs of letting up.

1st Star: Maximiliano Urruti ($8.5m)
Quite simply, the hardest working player on the team. Think Jamie Vardy, but a bit taller, a bit better looking, a bit harder working… Ok, forget Vardy. This guy is exactly the type of player you want running the line on his own. He will chase down EVERYTHING. He doesn’t even know the meaning of the phrase “a lost cause”. No really, he doesn’t. Although to be fair, he doesn’t speak a word of English, so technically, he doesn’t understand any English phrases. But even if you said it to him in French he wouldn’t know what you meant. Probably because he’s Argentine and doesn’t speak any French either. But… Oh you get the idea.

He scored his second goal of the season this weekend, and given the creativity of the three players behind him, you can expect a lot more as the season unfolds. If it wasn’t illegal for me to do so, I’d bet on him beating his Portland goal tally of 10 from last season.

Special feature: Introducing… Fabian Bazan (FC Dallas fitness coach)
As the season goes on (and as we run out of FC Dallas players to write about) we will start introducing you to some of the supporting members of the FC Dallas set up. We start with Fabian Bazan, the fitness coach. The best way to describe Bazza is to use a Football Manager (the computer game) analogy. If truly adjusted, his stats for Motivation, Drive / Determination etc would be off the charts. Think Alex Ferguson on acid. Once the game starts, he calls out those unlucky souls who have been awarded “substitute” status for the match, and he starts warming them up. And by “warm up”, think extreme military boot camp. And he doesn’t stop. Those poor bastards are still being “warmed up” as the game enters time added on at the end of the 90th minute. The unused subs actually finish the game more tired than those that played in it. It’s truly an incredible sight to behold.

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Montreal
3rd Star: Laurent Ciman ($8.7m)
Despite the score line, the poor man’s Pascal Cygan actually had a good game on Saturday. For large periods of the game he single handedly kept FC Dallas’s front four at bay. His positional play was solid, he was fully (sometimes overly) committed to the tackle, and offered a decent bit in attack too. He’s started the season averaging just under 7 points per game. Not bad considering Montreal have kept just the one clean sheet. After an away game to Seattle next, there are a few games where Ciman could score well. Just remember those three red cards from last season though. His style of play is not for the faint hearted.

2nd Star: Ignacio Piatti ($10.4m)
After the start Piatti has made to the season, I was expecting big things from him on Saturday night. What we actually witnessed was a reminder of just how weak this league is. Against a lesser team, I could absolutely see Piatti running riot. Great in one on ones, a fantastic eye for a through ball, incredibly creative with his all-round attacking play. But, against a good team like Dallas, he was kept fairly quiet throughout. That said, after Seattle on the road next, he comes up against Columbus and then Chicago. I’d definitely consider bringing Piatti into my team against those two.

1st Star: Stella Artois ($10 per pint)
In what was mainly a disappointing outing for those with European sounding names, this guy truly produced one of the best performances of the night. Showed up from the first whistle and shone throughout the ninety minutes. His pace was quite intoxicating, and at times his presence became quite an irritant for the Dallas crowd. He frequently enticed a loud (sometimes expletive laden) responses, sometimes quiet unexpectedly, from section 103, row 15 in particular. At one point he clashed badly with Didier Drogba as he warmed up on the side line, before being replaced by Boubon Gin in the 95th minute. Definitely one to keep an eye on.

Goat: Didier Drogba
Came on in the 70th minute. Walked around a bit. Moaned at some of his players. Signed some autographs. Left.
No disputing the guy’s talent, but this was not a fit, or interested Drogba. I’d avoid him for at least another week as he looks to regain some of the sharpness and touch that we saw at the end of last season.

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Notes:
Note 1: You’ve seen SpringWatch. (UK readers). We’ll we bring you… Hollingshead HairWatch: In the first of what we hope will become a regular feature, we take a closer look at the MLS’s own Olivier Giroud. This week Hollingshead had his glossy locks pulled back into a snazzy tight bun (perfectly in tune with the latest Dallas fashion for the Easter season), offset with a beautifully cropped, 3 day stubble. A little patchy, but he pulled it off. This week, his hair played a full 90 minutes, and despite a nervy moment when it went up for a header in the 63rd minute, it looked awesome throughout.

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Thanks for reading Socks, Sandals and Soccer: MLS Game Week 3 – Dallas Style. This article was written by Chins & Lawdogg

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