Who are you? Who are you? Fantasy manager profiles
Here at FF247 towers we’ve often wondered what driving forces skulk behind a comment or a rate my team reply, do we really know the mindset and the persona of the people we are conversing with?! To find the answers to these questions we have lured some regulars from out of their caves and got them to endure a simple Q&A session.
Hopefully this will help us to uncover whether each member can be viewed as a ‘fellow sports enthusiast’, ‘colleague’, ‘fantasy friend’, ‘internet troll’ or indeed ‘sociopath’! Let’s take a look inside the minds of our first two ‘victims’ then and see whether, hiding behind the cute monkey gravatars, lurks a sadistic, megalomaniacal, psychotic keyboard warrior. Or just a normal guy or gal who likes to play fantasy football…
First up on the chopping block are Tekno and chins and bellies.
THE BASICS
Members name: Tekno-kun
Real name: Jostein Bjørkum Andersen
Occupation: Student
Age:20
Country of residence: USA (Norwegian of birth)
Best finish in The Barclays Premier League Fantasy Football game: 47,738
Current position for the season: 382,685
Planned finish (at the start of the season) for FPL in 2014/2015: Top 20k
Expected finish for the BPL FF game in 2014/2015: Top 20k
Tell us about yourself in less than 50 words: I’m smart, rational, intellectual, independent, rebellious, eccentric, arrogant, handsome, and honest. I excel at logic and reason, but suck at emotions. I care little for conformity, preferring the eccentric and unique instead.
FAVOURITES
Food: Special Brownies
Drink: Orange juice
Band/Type of music: Gorgoroth/Norwegian black metal
TV Programme: Game of Thrones, anime
Films: This Is England, The Last Samurai, Pineapple Express
Book/Author: A Song of Ice And Fire, Nietzsche, manga
Joke: David Moyes
Country visited (and state why!): Netherlands, wanted to try their special brownies.
Country would most like to visit (and state why!): Japan, anime and manga fan so interested in Japanese culture.
SPORTING FAVOURITES
Sport: Soccer
Sporting Team: Manchester City
Sporting Personality: Zlatan Ibrahimovic
Sporting moment on TV: When Aguero scored in injury time and City won the title. Sobbed like a little girl.
Sporting moment witnessed live: Seen some PL matches and Norway’s national team. Nothing noteworthy.
Sporting venue or event you’d most like to visit: Superbowl
Do you have any personal sporting achievements you’d like to boast about: In 5th grade I scored 10 goals in one schoolday. Legend.
RANDOMS
Person you most look-alike in the celebrity world: According to a celebrity match-maker I look alike Orlando Bloom, Justin Timberlake, Leonardo Di Caprio, Adam Sandler, and Robert Duvall.
Which 6 celebrities dead or alive would u have at a dinner party: Nietzsche, Einstein, Oscar Wilde, Napoleon, Aristotle, Anton LaVey.
Which 3 items would u take to a desert island (no humans allowed!): Adult ‘Art’ magazines, Nintendo 3DS and special brownies.
If you won £100,000 what would u do with it: Buy all the video games I want, then invest and save the rest.
The perfect afternoon would be spent: High.
My Epitaph would read: What the fudge is an epitaph.
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THE BASICS
Members name: Chins and Bellies
Real name: Iain (That’s an “I” at the start, not a “L”. Honestly. Some people.)
Occupation: Currently unemployed. Finance person by trade, currently unemployed. Just moved countries and seeking work! Anyone?
Age: 35
Country of residence: USA.
Best finish in The Barclays Premier League Fantasy Football game: Somewhere in the top 5k. I don’t recall exactly. Oh ok, it was position #3,961. (I have it tattooed on my arm).
Current position for the season: 284,379.
Planned finish (at the start of the season)for FPL in 2014/2015: 1st. Obviously.
Expected finish for the BPL FF game in 2014/2015: Top 50,000 would be nice after that start.
Tell us about yourself in less than 50 words: Essex boy with Scottish roots. Father of two. Family and I moved to the US in June. Loving the American life. Tacos and American Fantasy Football are my two current favorite things.
FAVOURITES
Food: Despite the Taco references, you can’t beat Chicken and Ham pie, or a Roast Dinner.
Drink: Cold Stella Artois. Although a glass of Sancere is pretty damn good too when I’m feeling a bit more cultured.
Band/Type of music: I listen to a bit of everything from Rap to Country Music. Favorite band are Phoenix. (French Electronica-type coolness.)
TV Programme: Can’t pick one. Love list includes The Wire. Pointless. The Trip. Mysterious Cities of Gold (80’s cartoon!). Alan Partridge. 24. Breaking Bad.
Films: Office Space. Dumb and Dumber. Dragnet. NWH (Fear of a black hat). Talladega Nights. Night at the Roxbury. AnchorMan. Don’t be a menace to south central while drinking your juice in the hood. Hoop dreams. White men can’t jump. Naked Gun.
Book/Author: I have all of the Andy McNab and all of the John Grishams. Love them all. But my favorite single book is ‘Bonfire of the Vanities’ by Tom Wolfe. Highly recommend you read it.
Joke: My two favorite comedians are Stewart Francis and Milton Jones. A joke from each of them: “My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance; we’ll see about that.” (Stewart Francis) And… “The worst job I ever had was as a forensicologist for the United Nations. One time I thought I’d come across the mass grave of a thousand snowmen, but it turns out it was just a field of carrots.” (Milton Jones)
Country visited (and state why!): Not very exciting, but probably Germany! Beautiful countryside, towns and villages. Cool cities. Brilliant roads. Nice people. Great food and beer.
Country would most like to visit (and state why!) Japan. Just for something completely different. And I like Fish.
SPORTING FAVOURITES
Sport: Football (Soccer), but the players nowadays make it very hard to love it as much as I used to.
Sporting Team: Arsenal, but with the same caveat as above.
Sporting Personality: Dennis Bergkamp. I was lucky enough to have a season ticket at Highbury for Bergkamps first season at Arsenal. Best player ever.
Sporting moment on TV: Ray Parlours goal in the 2002 FA Cup final win against Chelsea.
Sporting moment witnessed live: Vieira’s FA Cup winning penalty against Man Utd and last ever kick in an Arsenal shirt, or… Bergkamps first goal at Highbury.
Sporting venue / event you’d most like to visit: Seattle’s NFL stadium.
Do you have any personal sporting achievements you’d like to boast about: Sadly, no.
RANDOMS
Person you most look-alike in the celebrity world: Gary Kelly. Right back that used to play for Leeds Utd. Not exactly a celebrity but its the best I could do.
Which 6 celebrities dead or alive would u have at a dinner party: Alexander the Great, Robin Williams, Jesus, Adolf Hitler, Albert Einstein and Jim Carrey.
Which 3 items would u take to a desert island (no humans allowed!): A football. Fishing equipment. A boat.
If you won £100,000 what would u do with it: Buy a bigger house or invest it for the boys future. Sorry, boring.
The perfect afternoon would be spent: Having a picnic in a park on a sunny day (not too hot), playing with my boys, keeping up-to-date with the football as Arsenal put 8 past Chelsea. Mourinho getting sacked and Wenger retiring immediately after the game.
My Epitaph would read: Loving husband, father, grandfather and great grandfather. Oldest ever debutant for Arsenal FC. First man to live to 150 years old.
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Many thanks to both Tekno and chins and bellies for being so candid! We hope you know your two fellow ‘fantasy friends’ a little better now. Next up for inspection are B-Bash and NIN…
If you feel that you would like to expose your inner self then please feel free to mail us at contact@fantasyfootball247.co.uk and we shall have peakydave interrogating you quicker than you can say ‘no really, those are my wife’s pants’.
Thanks for reading Who are you? Who are you? Fantasy manager profiles – Fantasy Premier League 2014-15. This article was written by peakydave
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Thanks for including me in this guys. I had no idea I was 20 years old, I thought my birthday was on Monday :big-lol:
And I still have no clue what an epitaph is
Haha cheers tekno,originally I asked for peoples date of birth but was informed that it could make u vulnerable to hackers,passwords etc so in calculating how old u were I thought this article was going out after your birthday!! Comprendez?!?!?! Epitaph-google it!! 😉
Tekno, great read mate thanks for your effort! And of course young David for putting them all together! So what are the special brownies you keep talking about? 😉
Brownies that make you feel gooooooood NZ. They can also make you see stuff and give you superpowers.
Haha tekno. It certainly changes your view on things 😉
Ok people this is the current team I do want Baines but not prepared to destroy my team for him so azpi seems a good alternative. With nothing in the bank can anyone suggest any good way to get him. Id rather keep the front 7 but anyone else is fair game to be cut! Thanks in advance.
Oi. You made changes now our teams don’t look-a-like anymore. Anyway, you are 3 points ahead. I HAVE BAINES NOW THOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAH!
Isn’t it supershite Chambers picked up another yellow? The freaking arseface!
Raz, YOU made changes! Haha. Well done on baines pal, he’s a good shout! I know gutted about chambers
I still cant believe you’ve got that team with no wc played,no point in using it for 1 man regardless of how many transfers you have to make,and not worth multiple hits to get him in either ,ur better off as u are really mate!
I let emotion get the better of me and really want Falcao to succeed. Kun is more of a certainty even though he is injury prone.
Cheers peaky. Always good to get conformation things are going well.
If you are desperate for Baines then take out Fab for Chadli/Downing, as you can still maintain Chelsea cover through Costa. But i wouldnt do that.
Hello there. First time on your site – lots of interesting info. Would like some advice, please.
I’m only signing players with no Premier League minutes before this season. Restricts my choices, but hopefully I can compete reasonably. I’m a bit stuck at the moment, and could do with some sensible hints on short- to medium-term selection. Here’s my team:
Forster (Schmeichel)
Rojo, Moreno, Shackell (Dier, Gamboa)
Mane, Di Maria, Arfield, Alexis Sanchez (Andy King)
Pelle, Ulloa, Costa
Have 2FTs and £3.9 bank
Think my midfield is weak – but very few MFs performing at the mo (remember – only Premiership newbies allowed). Herrera would have been OK, but crocked. Have 3 each from Leicester and Southampton and 2 each from ManU, Burnley, which feels like risk not very well spread.
Advice, please?
Only have players that’s never played in the PL before? Did you eat special brownies before you came up with that idea?
I’d downgrade Sanchez to someone cheaper and upgrade Ulloa to Falcao. Tadic might be the best option, unless he’s too expensive. Mangala is also probably the best defender for you.
Thanks, Tekno.
Had thought of Mangala but worried about rotation and game time…Think my ManU and Liv defenders are a bit of a let-down, but perhaps persist for a while…
Looks like people’s assessment of Ulloa is going south fast…Wonder whether that’s really warranted after only two consecutive blanks, but have to agree that Falcao is high on wish list.
Tadic looks good, but already have Southampton full-house. Maybe not good idea to have two midfielders from same club… (but then again what was I doing with idea of ADM and Herrera???)
Brownies? Where can I get some?
Qwk, welcome to the site mate. That’s an interesting idea, good in you. I’m not going to be much help as can’t think of to many players. That said I like Raz’s ideas and to throw one more name into the mix (albeit Southampton); mane.
Hi NZ, thanks for the tip. I did sign Mane a few weeks back, when I used my WC as the transfer window closed. I knew I wanted a Southampton MF, but couldn’t afford Tadic. I got him as a future investment, and had him on subs bench for a couple of weeks. His value has gone down from 7.0 to 6.9, but I’ve held on – blind faith, I suppose. Also because I needed to repair other parts of my team’s fabric. Anyway, glad you also like the idea of Mane. It’s kind of affirming…Let’s hope he can break through now. S’hampton and Leicester both seems to have favourable fixtures in hte next 6 or so GWs, so I’m also going to hold my forward line as Ulloa, Pelle and Costa. I know loads of people are saying dump Ulloa. But I’m hoping this last couple of GWs have been a blip and he’l get back to scoring ways. Or am I being too sentimental about this?
Hi Qwk,
Good to see I’m not the only”special interest” manager out there… my team consists entirely of Latino players! Here’s my lot:
De Gea (Mannone)
Rangel Manquillo Fonte (Coloccini) (Vergini)
Willian Silva Fabregas DiMaria (Montero, leaving next gk for Fernando)
Ulloa Pelle Costa
Maybe we should start up our own Handicap League…
Hola, Manchos
Great idea! If you create a league, give me the code and we’ll see if there’s anyone out there who’ll join…Not saying I’ll be scorching the ground with any high gameweek scores, mind you…it might be very ordinary fare.
I like your Latino mix. There are also other possibilities, which I’m sure you’ve thought about. From the top of my head: Herrera (eventually, when fit), Sanchez, Fernando, Fernandez, Rojo, Enner Valencia, Oscar, Felipe Luis, Moreno Zabaleta, Aguero(!!!!) OMG it’s frightening what you could put together…
Wonder if anyone out there is running a team made up only of England-qualified players or some such – would be an interesting reflection on the state of the English game, wouldn’t it? (Are you watching, Roy Hodgson?)
Or how about a team made up solely of loanees – blooming difficult, that one…
Or only aged under 21?
Or from teams not playing in CL or Europa League?
Anyone out there?
You could have cambiasso at Leicester, a solid player who will pop up with the occasional goal
Hi, Photek
Sorry no reply til now – work inconveniently got in the way. Most inconsiderate.
Thanks for your tip. Yep – Cambiasso made a splash in the Leicester-ManU game, but not sure if Pearson is going to give him too much game time. Leicester are potentially a source of cheapish midfielders who on their day can get points (Mahrez, King, Hammond, Cambiasso and Drinkwater, for example) – but I’m not confident that these are going to be regular starters….
i’m thinking of a straight swap from Fabregas to Hazard.
Anyone else thinking the same?
G’day Bundeena, long time no see mate.
I presume this would be done for a hit, seeing as no money in the kitty?
Personally, I don’t see a basis for dropping Fab at this stage.
Hi Blue, you gotta love spring time in Sydney. looking good on the water today.
No hurry, probably do next GW and not take a hit, just thinking it over.
Fab is owned by everyone. Hazard looks like he could score at will and is about to explode with points.
no hurry just seeing what others thought.
Dont think I would do that, unless your mini league rival has Fab and you are desperate to find a differential.
Both Haz and Fab have more or less the same score. Fab will have consistent scores with his assists and Haz will pop in goals every now and then.
Love the snowman joke, Chins!
I’m here, but at the same time, I’m there. I’m like, unified with the universe, floating with the clouds. Stones have souls. Peace