New Signings – Fantasy Premier League 2015/16. Mings, Distin, Atsu
***FREE BOOZE**** ***SEX THINGS*** ***CASH GIVEAWAY***
Right, quick, lock the doors Mito!
Ok, now that I have your attention and the Colombian Mafia have the exits covered, I can tell you that this isn’t going to be the most exciting list of new arrivals you’re ever going to read. Sometimes life just deals you a rubbish hand. Sometimes you get the shitty end of the stick. And sometimes, you accidently park your car in Cookie’s space on the same day as he’s deciding who gets to write up which new players.
So then, let’s see what you make of this lot…
The Bournemouth Three. Mings, Distin and Atsu (Bless you!)
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[/three_fourth]Tyrone Mings (Bournemouth) Not content with a league leading number of clean sheets last season, Eddie Howe has looked to strengthen his back line with record signing, £8m Tyrone Mings from Ipswich Town.
The 22 year old, ex-mortgage adviser, scored 1 goal and provided 4 assists in 40 starts for the Tractor Boys last season, and his signing will almost certainly mean Charlie Daniels loses his place as the regular starting left back.
If the vast amount of research I have done for this article is to be believed, he stands at a cloud-bothering 6ft 5ins tall, so as well as providing from the wings, he should also represent a decent threat from set pieces.
Fantasy view: As a record signing, he’ll be looking to impress. Along with opposite full back Francis and centre back Cook, he’s a contender for that important 5th defender slot.
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Sylvain Distin (Bournemouth)
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Not content with a league leading number of clean sheets last season, Eddie Howe has… shamelessly used the same intro twice in a row.
As well as providing cover / rotation for regular centre back pairing Cook and Elphick, I expect that 37 year old Distin’s signing is as much about providing the squad with some valuable Premiership experience. Especially after their previous resident old man Ian Harte was released earlier this summer.
Distin only made 16 appearances for Everton last season, before leaving when his contract expired, so don’t expect a huge number of appearances. This is his second spell on the south coast after a 2 year stay at Portsmouth. Rumour has it that he’s working his way along the coast to Southampton in order to secure a guaranteed move to Liverpool in 2016.
Fantasy view: Only an option if he can secure a regular starting spot.
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Christian Atsu (Bless you!! Here, have a tissue. Thanks. Here you go. No no, you keep it.) (Bournemouth)
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The third of our Bournemouth three, is Chelsea winger Christian Atsu, (Bless you!!! Thanks. Sorry, the hay fever is really bad this year. Yeah, it really is. Eyes itching? Yeah, a little. That’s rough. So how’ve you been? Not bad, other than the hay fever. Family keeping well? The cat died, but other than that, we’re good. Thanks for asking) signed on a season-long loan.
The 23 year old Ghana international spent last season on loan at Everton, making just 5 Premiership appearances (mainly coming on for the last 5 minutes) and only 1 start. He also didn’t feature at all for the last 2 months of last season.
He’ll be hoping for more opportunities this time out, and his competition for a starting place will be considerably less than it was at Everton. He has a decent international pedigree – an international with over 30 caps, including runner-up at the 2015 Africa Cup of Nations, in which he also won Player (and goal) of the tournament.
Fantasy view – Possible 5th Mid / bench fodder if cheap. Monitor in pre-season.
Sh*t-joke-potential – Awesome. Starting XI and captain every week.
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New Fixture Tracker added!
And whilst we have you, may we just bring your attention to the new fixture tracker that has been added. Last week we launched the Home & Away rotation tracker and both beauties can be found under the ‘Tips’ tab at the top and then under, unsurprisingly, ‘Fixture Tracker’ If that all sounds like too much hard work then here’s a quick link and also a picture of the dam thing if you’re uber lazy!…
Both have proved a massive hit on twitter. We hope you like them too.
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What 4.5m defenders are sure starters?
I would think O’shea, collochinni and Huth are sure starters
Plenty, I’d guess. If you got any particular teams maybe say them and we’l check if there’s any 4.5m starters from them?
Sorry, got hungry and grabbed a bite. Give me 15 minutes or so and I will have something up here.
Hey All – Would really appreciate some analysis on this one as it currently stands!
Hi Petenz, Aguero could be AWOL for a few weeks at the star of the season, Chelsea has a few hard games afterw GW1, so not sure you want to strat with Courtois in goal. HOW LVG will play Schneidelin is any once guess, but i think it will be more defensive. Steven Taylor? thats a new one i dont know too much about him. lol. Apart from that, team is quite strong
Here you go fellas. Obviously this also speaks to the capacity of some players to stay fit and not be rotated. Hazard in particular is great because we seemingly never have to worry about him not playing.
Cheers Mito.
If only could stay fit!!
*Theo
That’s an insane score for Walcott. Also fascinating that Milner would have outscored Cazorla, Ozil, and Ramsey.
Yeah, that’s why I did his last 3 seasons. Still shocking even when I did the one where he logged more than 2000 minutes. We have always said he is fantasy gold.
What about Aguero?
292 FPL points for him Tekno if he played 3420 minutes. 35 goals and 14 assists.
Cheers Mito. That’s great but what the hell is that for Walcott 390??!! How?
Mane has a good points return too.
@Matt, he didn’t play any real minutes the last two seasons so his numbers got very distorted. When he did play he did very well so the projections got highly elevated. That’s why I went 3 seasons deep on him, even then though he was still awesome. 2012/13 season will give you the better outlook on him.
Still 290 is a great score. And best put of everyone.
Mito, this is top stuff mate. Really going to give this some big-time consideration as it really highlights that it’s not necessarily the big boys who get the points. Mane has insane potential for an 8m mid, really looking at Chadli in a different light now too. Again, top stuff :thumbup:
Also shows how essential Hazard is. He’s the only one getting massive game-time and he’s improving year on year. Could well be a “suarez-esque” haul from him this season.
He is only getting better, so he could well be.
Silva, Haz, Mane, Chadli and Milner really came off good. Theo if he starts is a must have, even if he produces a third less than 2012/13.
It has always been the issue with Theo, eh? When he plays, he’s devastating.
Very good work Mito I,m likeing these stats Mane , hendo , Milner I will take a closer look interesting top stuff
I think this post has been the catalyst for sudden furious tinkering, the world over 😉
I knew I was right about Hendo being shite! 😉
Ye I’m really surprised to see his points so low. I didn’t think they would have been. Still he was only 7 points behind our £49 mil payday.
Heh heh 😉 Indeed.
Which one is better? I do worry going without Hazard though
I’d be happier with team 2, I like the Fab – Wally combo and I much prefer having Rooney as my second striker compared to J Rod, I think you can have J Rod penciled in as your 3rd striker but it’s a stretch to far to have him as your 2nd for now, pre season could alter my thoughts on that but it’s still early days.
The third budget striker should throw up a few unfamiliar names again this season, I’m sitting on the Gabriel Agbonlahor bus with Benteke likely to depart, I still fancy Sherwood to have them more forward thinking than Lambert.
Yeah Sherwood is attacking. Expect they would bring someone in if Benteke goes. Interesting where he goes. I don’t think he would be a great signing for Liverpool as they don’t cross the ball enough
Man Utd do though smash, I’ve got my fingers crossed for that one.
Yeah I think he would do well there. Though they have been linked with bigger names
@Smash10, I take team 2 if I had to pick one. If Saints don’t purchase a CB, I think Yoshi will be fine. Hoban is probably a necessary evil because of his price tag, so I won’t debate you much on that one. Just keep an eye out for someone to replace Hoban if we happen to learn of any 4.0 defender starting and a 4.5 mid who might produce more than Bentaleb.
Thanks. I love a 4 million defender so will keep an eye on that. Hopefully at least one plays. Yeah Bentaleb really ain’t a great choice. Value is just so tight at this stage. I still think saints will sign a CB so yoshi will have to go. Manager likes him though