FPL Captain Picks Gameweek 29
Welcome to FPL Captain Picks Gameweek 29
It’s fair to say that GW28 wasn’t very kind on the Captaincy front. One look at the weekly FPL ‘Dream Team’ confirms this, especially when you see names like Iheanacho, Stones, Meslier, Odegaard and Trossard leading the way. As for our own GW28 Tipsters it was a sorry old showing, with the exception of one:
1. DMC – Vardy, 26 points.
This week’s runaway leader, a good 20 points above his nearest rival. The only problem here was that he picked Kane himself!
=2. Rosco – Bruno, 6 points.
No customary penalty for Bruno this week.
=2. Smash – Martinez, 6 points.
Customary save points for our darling in the Villa goal, but no clean-sheet put paid to any chance of a sneaky armband-worthy return.
4. Kop – Bale, 2 points.
So much for all the hype!
5. Matt – Mahrez / Gundogan, 0 points.
Ermmm…. where to begin!
This week we have gone old school and rolled out some of our elders, let’s go see if they can fare any better, that’s if they stay awake long enough…
Mito – Harry Kane v Aston Villa (A)
There comes a moment when a site turns to an old writer from the past. Unluckily for me, they picked this moment so here I am stuck having to make up a paragraph or two up on Harry Kane. I guess it could be worse, I could have been tasked with writing about… well, any other player other than Harry Kane this week. Let us be serious here, are we really going to turn to anyone else this week? A bunch of the other candidates for this week basically went out and injured themselves and the rest can’t be trusted. I mean do you really want to risk a significant drop in the overall by captaining Bale? Sure, he has had some great weeks recently, he also doesn’t play a third of the game as he is always removed give or take a few minutes from the 60th minute mark. I guess you could go for a Lacazette or if you are a real hipster possibly even Raphinha. The thing about those two is that when you combine all their goals and assists, their totals are in both departments, less than Kane by himself and Lacaphinha have played about 1100 more minutes or so more.
Sure, Harry probably disappointed many a person this past GW, but so did many of the mainstream choices. So unless you captained Iheanacho or a City defender you probably didn’t come away with much. Kane stats this season are by any standard very impressive. If he had the same minutes as Bruno they be in a dead heat for the top FPL scorer, heck if he just got the amount of penalty opportunities Fernandes has he be easily ahead of him even with 200 minutes or so less. I usually don’t do this, but I am telling you to make the safe choice this week. There is already too much uncertainty this gameweek in terms of who will actually play (injuries), the amount of hits FPL managers will take, other managers on a free hit. There is certainly enough happening around us where there will be big differences in points without the adding of a punt for a captain choice into the mix. However, if you really are the type that just can’t resist going for broke, well I am sure my colleagues below will provide you with all the risky choices you could go for, probably some defender like Dunk or something, hahaha, well probably not that bad. Do yourself a favour though, don’t ask them who they are captaining this GW on their personal team, I hate for them to sound like hypocrites.
The Gallant Pioneer – Alexandre Lacazette v West Ham United (A)
BURNLEY, ENGLAND – MARCH 06:
What is more dangerous, the man who has nothing to lose or the man who has everything to lose?
When the call came in, I was not found wanting, ‘I’ll take a captain’ said I (not fully realising that this was the BGW and the fixtures are an abomination, and Kane was gone).
But referring back to the tag line – I’m the last guy anyone should be listening to when it comes to captains (no, stay with me, I’ll sell it). I couldn’t call the big guys correct and kept missing the big numbers, I took Sterling in the DGW with 180 minutes and got four points and the time before that I had him on TC and barely covered my hits. From then I’ve tried to be cute and bounced around the likes of Richarlison, Bamford, Salah and Calvert-Lewin with hardly as much as a ‘meh’.
So why Lacazette? Well I have nothing to lose and at least you know he’ll show up on time. He tucked away a lovely penalty in helping beating Spurs – his tenth league goal of the season – and has scored 7 points and above on nine separate occasions so far, one of which was in the reverse fixture at the Emirates.
So I say ‘pah’ to Mito and advise you to get your scream on with Laca…. and at least my guy scored in the derby!
Cookie – Lewis Dunk vs Newcastle United (H)
HOUSTON, TX – APRIL 10:
I have heard GW29 described as many things but the ‘Tory food parcel of gameweeks’ probably sums it up the best. Sure the fixtures are crap, even the half-decent teams cancel each other out. Therefore, and I know I may have previous here, but oblige me I pray, surely this is the week where you can have a bit of a punt on your skipper, live a little, who dares win, all that malarkey. If you truly believe that Kane will be Martinez’d, Antonio will be Leno’d, and Bamphina will be stifled by a stubborn Fulham defence, then surely you attack the team who has the most attractive fixture? It’s common sense right?
Newcastle at home is as good as it gets this week, but only because Sheff Utd and West Brom have the week off. Some of you folk may recall some idiot suggesting a Brighton defensive capo for a DGW in seasons past. Well yeah, once bitten, twice an idiot and all that.
Forget the Twitter talk of cheap ol’ Veltman, you get what you pay for in my book and so I urge you to pay up, get Lewis Dunk and captain the **** out of him.
Young Lewis has form with two goals in his last six matches, he loves a set piece this boy. Four goals this season in total.
For those of you who love an xG Stat (I don’t but will give you one anyway), Brighton are 3rd for xG and 1st for xG conceded in home games this season, while Newcastle are 20th for xG conceded.
So I’ve given you form and fixture, the ideal combo we’re told to target when choosing a captain. What more could you want, your captain decision delivered on a plate to you.
Don’t say you weren’t warned.
Although, it would be remiss of me not to tell you that I captained Ricardo Pereira last week…..
Kop – Jesse Lingard v Arsenal (H)
In the capos article for GW27 I hit the jackpot with Harry Kane! Did I manage to build on that in GW28? Did I balls! Gareth Bale didn’t even manage 60 minutes, thus returning just 1pt. FFS, even Ricardo Pereira managed 1pt!
To whom shall I turn to this week in an attempt to rebuild my reputation? Reputation? Who am I kidding! The obvious pick this week is probably Kane or Bale? Did you watch them against Arsenal? Enough said. The reality is that pickings are slim this week. With that in mind, I’m going leftfield….. Jesse Lingard.
West Ham have probably been the surprise packet this season and currently sit in 5th position, just three points off a CL place. They also sit in 5th position in the current form table, with three wins and a draw from their last six games.
Lingard has impressed since moving on loan to the Olympic Stadium in January and has four goals and two assists in six appearances, only blanking once. Over the past six gameweeks, he’s had 22 penalty area touches, 13 goal attempts of which eight were on target. It’s worth noting that the only midfielder to have more attempts on target during this period is Ilkay Gundogan.
Finally, remember that it’s important to give youngsters such as Jesse a chance!
The confessional…
This is where we ask our entire writing team to tell us who they think they will pick this week…. There are more caveats and get out clauses than a Lionel Messi contract but this is their initial gut feeling based upon who they actually own.
DMC — Bamford, if fit, if not then Raphinha
Jamesimmo — Kane
Swirly — Kane
Horse — Kane
Matt — Raphinha
Loud Atlas — Kane
Smash — Kane
Kop — Kane
Cookie – Slam Dunk
The Gallant Pioneer — Lacazette
Rosco — Kane
Ellefcee — Lingard
Floydeth — Kane
AT — Kane
Init — Bale
Mito — Harry Kane of course
VOTE ON THIS WEEK’S CAPTAIN POLL GW29
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Cookie has swayed me.
Dunk is my cappo now.
Where’re those biggun and hippo stickers.
I miss them.
There was a weird special effect caused by someone who needed to insert both to help illustrate a point they were making.
The biggun began firing at the hippo, which blasted the poor beast to pieces apart from its oddly motioning hand, which started writing out oddly cryptic tips like ‘captain Dunk’ etc.
So unsurprisingly the site had to remove them before they became unmoored and started drifting across the internet.
This comment has taken me to the stars, drifting across the galaxies, perplexed whether it’s reality or fantasy.
“Wear the grudge like a crown of negativity
Calculate what we will or will not tolerate
Desperate to control all and everything
Unable to forgive your scarlet lettermen”
All hail the cookie fan club. My team is set
It has a demented logic.
Like other sides I’ve seen, (constructive) criticism seems meaningless.
It makes my side seem as exciting as buying a tin of beans at the supermarket.
For your sanity I’d recommend not following the Brighton game live.
Ok. Just went through the hot topics.
:hippo: :aikido:
Plz help
Got 1ft 0.4itb
No FH
Depends who you are happy to lose for a bit I suppose?